“Is he okay?” Palutena was out of her element, she usually studied magic. Science was baffling to her, it wasn’t something a lot of people in skyworld believed in.
“I will feed you to the Chaos Kin. I swear I will… Even I can make exceptions.”
Well she certainly seemed to be happy! A little too happy but… The best way to a woman’s heart, you know! Goethe nibbled here and there on a few crab legs, not having had them in a while, and focused on drawing in power. Power from what? His domain had grown a bit since he started gaining strength as a Demigod, expanding beyond simple tempura and into food itself. But as an underworld dweller, he was drawn more to the “darker” aspects of food… Hunger. Gluttony. Corpulence. Overindulgence. Not that it was a totally bad thing, of course.
What was wrong with living to eat?
Especially with the Skyland dwellers. They saved the world from Hades. They deserved a good meal. And so did he, for providing it! He snapped an entire spider crab up, shell and all, chasing it down with an entire bowl of butter. He wasn’t very concerned with manners; not when everyone else was stuffing themselves full.
“You all enjoy yourselves! But remember…” He cast a dark look at all of them, pointing a long-nailed finger along the tables, “To save room for DESSERT!”
Already the kitchen was preparing itself for dessert. Batter poured itself into deep bowls of various shapes, each slipping into the ovens to bake. Freezers spat out boxes and boxes of ice cream flavors ranging from the simple vanilla all the way up to rainbow sherbert, and beyond. Frosting was hand—er, magic-made right in front of their eyes. He wasn’t as skilled with pastries as he was with meat, so he let his magic handle it while he chowed down on an entire turkey, after drowning it in four kinds of gravy. Now if only he could draw power from his own cravings…
“It’s kind of sad that Shrimp is missing out on all of this.” He said between forkfuls of turkey meat, “But it’s for the best. No offense or anything, but his taste far exceeds anything I’m preparing. …Except, maybe, for one thing…”
Palutena’s stomach was content five minutes ago, but she kept eating. She had slowed down a bit due to the richness of the food. “Yea, I don’t know why he’s not here. Pit loves food. He’s probably training himself alongside Pittoo..” Palutena frowned. She missed spending time with the
shimp angel, and she couldn’t help feeling like she was being replaced a bit by his dark side. She suffocated her feelings with the cheesiest hamburger she had ever had.
‘Pit tastes good?’ she thought to herself. She always thought he would taste like a sweaty toga. He wasn’t always the freshest daisy in the patch. The goddess then remembered a conversation she had heard the chaos kin having, about how sweet her soul was. Perhaps the Tempura god could taste the essence of a soul? She was perplexed as she slowly halted her eating to think about it all.
Palutena didn’t know if she wanted to know what tasted better than Pit. She was scared of the answer… She felt like Hansel and Gretel in the Witch’s gingerbread house. “Please, what exactly in the realm could taste better than Pit?” She had stopped enjoying the food altogether. There was not a hint of kindness in her voice, but it wasn’t exactly harsh either. This was her domain, she kept telling herself that in her mind and she had the necessary reinforcements if this was all a trap.
She scowled at the bandit and then looked to Conner. “This is safe right? …You know what, I don’t even care. I’m a goddess!” She then walked through the portal to Conner’s laboratory.
Palutena was preparing tables for everyone? Good! One less thing for him to worry about! Shifting a dial on the Tempura Club, sparks cracked across it as it transformed into a sleek, sharp and deadly Tempura Blade. “Jeffery! Like we practiced!” The cauldron responded, setting a wok over its opening as the God leaped onto it. With a burst of water, Goethe was launched high into the air where all his ingredients now floated.
With a hack and a slash and a flourish of chops with his handy weapon, slabs and chunks and diced bits of meat fell perfectly upon whatever implement was needed to cook them; steaks fell onto the grills, bits of chicken fell into the deep friers while entire chickens dropped neatly onto oven racks, hamburgers fell onto griddles, grills, oven tops and the like, crab and lobster fell into boiling pots… Not one piece out of place. Excellent. But there was still work to do!
Landing gracefully, the Blade cut itself in half, and formed into a floating set of Orbitars. They had a minigun-like apparatus on the top and on the front, but only one needed to be loaded. Goethe gathered up the bottles and flasks of spices, herbs and sauces, plugging the opening into the top of his Orbitars. Then, dashing around his kitchen, both of the miniguns fired at his food… The top spun the condiments around, as the front actually fired the mixes at each of the foods.
His magic sped the cooking up so they didn’t have to wait too long; the scent of meat and herbs quickly filled the air, carrying itself across all of Skyworld. He was making a meal to feed a city! He kicked deep fryer racks out of the machines, bashed ovens open, upturned griddles… But they were all animated by the potion, rolling with his blows as they tossed the finished foods around the area. They were fast, and Goethe was faster, now wielding a pair of Tempura Claws that easily allowed him to handle the hottest of dishes, spreading them out along each of the tables Palutena had set up.
With the same speed he threw plates and silverware along until each table was packed to the brim. And finally, only after setting a bottle of his most valuable wine at Palutena’s table, did he relax, his claws reforming into his staff. Jeffery quickly scuttled up to him and caught him as he fell, exhausted, with a watery hand, flicking his hoverbowl out and setting the spend God in it.
“Ahaa… Totally worth it.” After catching his breath, he stood in his bowl and turned to the waiting centurions. “Drinks are supplied by the soda fountains!” He stated, pointing to the ten or so animated fountains that stood at the end of the kitchen, ready for any amount of customers, “Now… EAT YOUR FILL!”
He turned back to Palutena, who’s table he payed extra attention to. She had a little of everything set out for her, but he didn’t expect her to eat all of it; no, most of this was for him to make up for the energy he spent. “So, what do you think?”
“What do I think?” the goddess held a vacant expression, “I think we should eat!” She retorted without knowing, her hunger getting the best of her. She took one last look at her crowds of centurions happily munching away at the great mass of food that was prepared. Then she drove a fork into a chicken dumpling and blushed madly as she raised it to her mouth, she could taste it without even consuming it. It was a weird sensation but very pleasant, perhaps one of the most pleasant she had ever felt. She took a bite.
“Oh. Ooooh! Oh!!” It was worth the wait. Her stomach’s growling got worse, not because she was getting more hungry, but because her body wanted to consume as much of the food as possible. Every bite she took was a different experience. Every now and then she would sip some wine to cleanse her palate. She then dug into the shell of a lobster tail and dipped it in the most heavenly butter that resided next to it. Examining the butter closer, it seemed to have some herbs mixed into it. She inhaled the piece of shellfish and she could swear that it was dancing in her mouth. She giggled as she enjoyed what seemed like ecstasy in her mouth.
“Oh Goethe!!!” she was almost crying his name between bites. It seemed like her pace of eating sped up drastically. Before she was savoring it by eating as little at a time but she found that to be the cruelest of torture. She wanted to try all of it. “